The day begun extremely well...I woke up and saw some miniature monkeys playing in the trees outside my window.
"Oooooooohhhhh....monkeys, monkeys......OH MY GOD...there be mini monkeys in them trees there!!!"
"There are NO monkeys in the city, woman!"; The Husband rolled his eyes.
"Babe, I'm telling you...there are monkeys there."
I swiftly grabbed some bananas and hurried downstairs.
"Monkey, monkey!!! Come here. I got some bananas for you!!! Come!"; I called.
Surprisingly, 3 mini monkeys casually came over and started eating banana out of my hand. I was overwhelmed. I wanted to put them in my pocket and run. They would be my babies and I would be their human mom.
The idyllic scene was interrupted by a passer-by: "Do you have monkeys in Spain?"; he asked in all seriousness.
"Spain??? I'm from England, bruv. We have monkeys in a zoo."
"Not on the street?"; he continued.
"What about birds?"
"Well, we have birds. But not colourful ones. Just...y'know...pigeons...also known as flying rats."
"Oh."; he said, undoubtedly feeling sorry for the lack of colourful fauna in England, and continued on his merry way.
I then stopped in a neighbourhood cafe.
For a coffee, obvz.
"Would you like some "Crazy Nigga" cake to go with your coffee?"; asked the lady.
I nearly spluttered my coffee all over the coffee shop: "I'm sorry...you wh...you what??? What cake???"
"Crazy Nigga cake!! Freshly made today!"; she was offering me what looked like a chocolate cake covered in chocolate sprinkles, adding helpfully: "It's a traditional Brazilian cake."
"And it's called Crazy Nigga?"; I was incredulous.
"Yes."; she said beaming from ear to ear: "It's delicious!"
"Ummmm....I'll have a slice. Thank you."
Political correctness clearly hasn't made it to Brazil. The cake, indeed, was delicious, but they really should rethink the name.
Straight after my daily coffee and cake fix, I turned to my husband and announced with a serious face: "I need feathers and fruit in my hair."
"Feathers and fruit!"; I said matter of factly.
"What's wrong with you woman? I'm pretty sure you didn't exhibit any signs of madness when I maried you."
"Well, it's carnival tomorrow, remember? We bought tickets. And even though I won't be parading around naked covered in strategically placed glitter, I figure I could at least have some feathers and fruit on my head. Also....ummmm...I found this cool shop on internet that sells stuff like that."
"You can pluck the chicken and glue some fruits from supermarket. It'll be the same."; he laughed.
I rolled my eyes and put my foot down: "No!!! I need these accessories. I came ALL THIS WAY and now you want me to be FEATHERLESS for carnival!!!! It's unheard of!!! You're mentally torturing me."
He gave in.
I walked in a small atelier selling wacky headgear and started perusing.
Straight after me, a breathless Brazilian girl run in shouting: "Have you got anything Carmen Mirandaaaa?????"
She plonked a big plastic fruit basket on her head and admired herself in the mirror.
Not to be outglittered and outfruited by Brazilians, I reached for the nearest plastic, glittery fruit headpiece too.
"Are you taking the piss???"; proclaimed The Husband.
"Erm..."; I dropped the fruit basket and picked up a rose crown a la Frida Kahlo.
"It's still too much. Where on earth are you gonna wear this once the Carnival is over, eh??"; he said.
"Erm...Mexican themed parties...?"; I answered.
"Oh yeah. Because London is full of those, right?"
I bought the crown anyway.
Now if anyone knows any Mexican parties coming up in London, holla!
Blouse: Zara (similar here )
Rose crown: Can Can Acessorios
Shorts: French Connection (similar here )
Shoes: Whistles (similar here )
Bracelet: Ottoman Hands (similar here )
Linking up with: Travel Tuesday